Don't Cry LOVE

They cried, “I don't deserve him, I don't deserve her!”

       Well then, why do you feel that way, do you think you deserve yourself? You say you are in love, and you are in love but, love is not about you becoming acquiescent to your partner's whims and it will never. Love is not indentured servitude, and pop-culture has a lot to do with this pretense.

    We all are guilty, of craving love, and once you accept that it is ok too long for someone then, you can begin to cope, with the ever presence loneliness. Ever present "aloneness" is a part of the human condition. It is often romanticized that you will find love and never feel alone again.

      Love is not about feeling, never being alone again. Love is about mutual understanding. If you love someone they will open you, and even when they, leave you will be changed for the better.

I'm sure you had the experience of being with someone and feeling alone, but compare that to someone you just met, and now it is like the whole is not as harsh and regardless of how dark the world seems, you take solace in know that people like him or her exist.

       No matter where they are the world is just that much brighter.See love doesn't have a title, love does not have a proximity, and love does not have a time scale. Love is ever presence and the act of being in love just allowing that love to resonate. 

Life and Death!

      If, this shall be the end let us go into the darkness as courageously as we came into the light. Let us unforgivably give of ourselves, and mold this life as our own mothers gave life to us. See all space,time and matter are based upon ones own relativity. It is the mind that is the womb and in it this life that takes place our child.
         As we go into the darkness, truth is revealed, that truth being this child, this life will go on and from the moment we brought it into existence this child it is no longer ours.So live,laugh and love courageously.
           Live so courageously,that you inspire wonder and every shooting star speaks of that one time they saw fearless man.
Love so infectiously, that even the most pious and clean long to be stricken by your sickness.
And laugh, as if you we sinking to the bottom of the ocean, and with every out burst you were given one breath.
           If, this is to end then know that it is because I made it so, because deep down we all know there is no such thing.Those who love for ever live in us, and they act in our actions.
            Funny how, me and Friend use to feed the poor every Sunday. Then one week my friend grew sick and died. I stopped feeding the poor for many years, until one day I felt his presents and decided to go again. After a Sunday of feeding the poor a man with out a home told me, "you are kind you remind of this man who use to feed us every Sunday,You don't look a thing like him, but you remind of him." I smiled and thought, " yes, I know he is physically not here, but spiritually we couldn't be any closer."
        Yes, we all exist at some point but, to live, to live is priceless because for those who truly live, we all know one could never just die.

Happy Holidays

The message is simple! You are loved, regardless of what mistakes you have made. Your are loved regardless of how think you look. You matter and it may seem at times you are alone, but you are not. People may not going around announcing, but it is Simple we are all in this together. I hope on this day, you feel loved, loved your self and always try your best to get out their and start Loving One Another !!!

Cure the Disease not the Symptom

In recent weeks I have come across many articles talking about Florida and its prison population and most of the articles showed a direct correlation between failing students and youth in prison.  Harvard Journal of Hispanic Policy discussed how students who were doing poorly in school would be funneled into the prison system, “Schools indirectly drive children into the juvenile justice system by criminalizing a wide variety of student behavior, including behavior as minor as tardiness, absences, noncompliance, and disrespect” (Castillo). Most of this minor behavior will evolve into a life time of crime, but if we establish better policies in school we can stop this trend of turning students into prisoners.

The prison industrial complex in the United States continues to grow and expand, not because of a growing rate of criminals but because a growing rate of repeat offenders. “More than fifty percent of prisoners will be arrested again just after sixteen months of their release” (Barret). This statistic shows that the prison industrial complex is not resolving the psychological issues of our inmates. After years of incarceration, inmates become well-adjusted to the prison life style and cannot assimilate back to the civilian life style. In order to resolve this growing problem we must start reforming our schools because it is often delinquent children who grow into offending adults. In Florida it seems like a trend that the students go directly from the school system into the prison industrial complex. Most of the repeat violent offenders have a history of violence that trails back to their childhood. If we started providing counseling and alternative methods of discipline for our at risk youth, we will be able to control the rising prison population. “It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men” (Frederick Douglass).

Some schools in Florida look at all students acting out in a black and white manor allowing no room for a shade of grey. Regardless of what is going in in the child’s life, the child is at fault and needs to be punished. Many examples were found, in a one example, “a six year old was handcuffed, arrested, and driven away from school after throwing a tantrum in her kindergarten class. Because of her small stature, the handcuffs were placed around her biceps. She was subsequently taken to county jail, fingerprinted, had a mug shot taken, and was charged with a felony and two misdemeanors” (Walter, S., Lambie, G. & Ngazimbi, E.). Regardless of the child’s age or reason for acting out, the 6 six year old was severely punished. In other cases children were placed in jail, with criminals. Regardless of if the child gets his or her record expunged at the age of 18, the child will have to live with the trauma of being incarcerated. In addition to that, the child will only have more resentment towards the school and this will cause more out breaks. For some children the school is the only safe place they know they can get a full meal and be safe.

Not all students are bad, most students who act out have not been taught proper way of managing their emotions. In many cases, children acting out were showing symptoms of child abuse. The scholarly journal A Choice Theory Counseling Group Succeeds with Middle School Students Who Displayed Disciplinary Problems exposes how school may be the child’s last safe place and chastising a student may push that child into the dark. Some other methods of disciplining students have shown great promise such as Reality Therapy, “Reality Therapy may be seen as the implementation of Choice Theory, where the educator teaches students the basic tenet of Choice Theory: the only person I can control is myself” (Walter, S., Lambie, G. & Ngazimbi, E.) After taking these lessons a student is better fit for the rigors of life and can adjust better to the school environment.  Students have strengths and weaknesses across the board when it comes to school, but when it comes to emotional health the school disciplinary system is blind to this. Not all students have the same emotional capabilities, so it is unfair to judge with the same rules as regular students. Some student come from unstable homes, “We must understand their needs. In addition to their physical needs - food, clothing, and shelter - kids need fun, freedom, power, and a sense of belonging. If these needs aren't met in positive ways, problems develop” (Diana Browning Wright). The main problem with the school system is its consistent failure to flag down students who show signs of learning difficulties at an early age. Once a child is discovered as an at risk youth, the school should be notified that this student should be viewed under special conditions. Children are resilient but only if they have the tools .Teaching students that they have control over their own live is an empowering experience for the students.

The issue of school policies and its disciplinary methods being indifferent toward the plight of all students is as relevant today as it was in the past. We must all come together to ensure the student have the power to develop their own wellbeing psychologically. A poem that resonates with me and this topic is Invictus by William Ernest Henley because everyone deserves the right tools, to make sound judgment. Every student deserves a chance and a part of this poem expresses that we are all in charge of our lives “Beyond this place of wrath and tears looms but the Horror of the shade, and yet the menace of the years finds and shall find me unafraid I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.”(Henley)

Works Cited

Barret, D. “Prison Firm CCA Seeks to Reduce Number of Repeat Offenders.” Wall Street

Journal. 12 Sep. 2014. http://online.wsj.com/articles/prison-firm-cca-seeks-to-reduce-number-of-repeat-offenders-1410561176

Castillo, Jennifer. "Tolerance in Schools for Latino Students: Dismantling the School-to-Prison

Pipeline." Harvard Journal of Hispanic Policy 26 (2014): 43-58. ProQuest. Web. 2 Dec. 2014.

 http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.saintleo.edu/docview/1618349164?accountid=4870

Walter, S., Lambie, G. & Ngazimbi, E. “A Choice Theory Counseling Group Succeeds with

Middle School Students Who Displayed Disciplinary Problems.” Middle School Journal, 40(2), 4-12. Nov. 2008. Retrieved from http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.saintleo.edu/docview/217441116?accountid=4870

Wright, B, Diana. “Changing Children's Behavior in School” Great Schools. Web.2012

http://www.greatschools.org/parenting/behavior-discipline/711-helping-change-behavior.gs

Henley, W, William. “Invictus” Poetry Foundation. Web. 1888

http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/182194

Love is simple

Love is natural, and love is simple even animals are capable of love. Why do we make love into this maze, or Rubix cube? Where does the convolution of love spawn?

 

I believe that love gets entangled, in the ideas of what we think should be and what is. In truth, you are a young man or woman whose life focus should be maintaining homeostasis but in actuality you are out trying to find love based on pretense. When you choose a mate, your mind subconsciously goes through every movie you watched, book you've read, etc. So we walk around with the preconceived notion that every love should be a replica of the prescribed love provided in pill form by mass media that we've ingested.

 

Every failed relationship becomes a striking resemblance, to when we found out Santa Claus was not real. Now please do not take this wrong, I do believe in love, and I do believe it not only exist but it is necessary for survival. Love has become an addiction and not real love but the pill form love. Think about it, all the dating sites and finding love sites created, "that is easy money for anybody with the soulless intent inspired by making money off of desperate people and their attempts to find love."

 

 

What I am saying is love takes time, and most people will falter because patience is a virtue we lack. If you are American the need to go faster is intoxicating, so when the prospect of love comes into our midst we swarm over it. It is only human to fall to such a stimuli, so no one should feel ashamed for falling, falling in love.

 

If you are male or female, the first kiss is coming into an endless sea of bliss and euphoria. Now it is once again only human to assume that intercourse is worse than a kiss, but in all actuality the kiss is the beginning of love.

Being A Man, Is easy. But, Why is Loving So Hard?

As a man society, the first woman we ever love, is our mother.

 As the years pass, men are subject to stringent social norms. Norms that make it hard, for men to express feelings. Love becomes taboo, love becomes a sign of weakness. When it is time for us to court, we are lost because we have blocked out how to love as a child.

 How to be fearless, and blinded a thought. If I could go to the past and ask my former self why I ever learned how to stand, I assure you the only reason I learned to stand was to touch my mother's face. The first word I spoke was only to call her name. I would wake from my dreams, just to see her. Her face is an image so beautiful that I dare not to dream it.

Now, fear has taken refuge in the space, where she would reside. I was never that strong, but I grew only so I could protect her, in the same way she protected me. Now, the years have passed and she is far away, I have coped with the storms raging, outside. I have learned, that the woman I will eventually grow to love will have an unusual power. She will, be able to help me defend against, myself.

It is Simple!!

!"Life is simple, you need help ask, yes simple but not easy. I do understand that asking for help is a journey in it's self, but when you ask you open doorways, that can only be shut by you. Life is tough, but that is the status of everyone's life. You need to understand that life will always be tough but you my friend have the GOD given RIGHT to change and become tough as well. So I challenge YOU to arm your self and become tough. Become a master of your life. You can, I know you can, I believe in you if I didn't,you wouldn't be receiving this message. Your journey begins when you decide to start. If you do not know how to start then like life it is simple...ASK!" -Sergio Velazquez

Learn How Too Love

          If you like some one tell them, It is what I do. Is is not perfect I have been turned down a lot. But on the 
other hand, I had the most amazing days ever!!!

          I even kissed the girl,the girl they write stories about.No that book is closed now, and yes we have both moved on to bigger and better things. But I still am happy because for one moment in time, the world stopped and time froze. You would think a storm was coming, the way are hearts were beating.

         For that one moment in time I knew absolutely nothing but had everything, I ever could need. HAHA, it is fun to think about but never the less, you like who you like for some strange reason or another so tell'em.

Who knows this is not magic, and finding a person to walk with you is not a chance thing, "it takes work!!!" Even if it fails as long as you learn something, it was a good experience.

          "Or maybe you will find the one,not the forever ever one, but the one who you're heart is worth breaking for."
                   No, not the most happy experience, but at least you know you are on the right track.

Finding Strength, In not So weak places

         Sitting down on my futon, with a white t-shirt covered in blood, I inspected the pool of tears left on my lap where her head was laying, thinking "dam this is hell." The Police officer on the scene told me "this too shall pass," to pissed to understand I brushed the phrase off and fell deep within my hopeless mind. 

  My head was pounding, the screaming in the next room stopped the blue and red lights faded as the police went off, and It was QUIET in the HOUSE. My thoughts 

E-c-h-o-e-d in this silence....Errrrrrrrrrrrrrr, the door from across the hall opened, and all of sudden 3 pairs of wide eyes were looking at me.

    At once, I snapped back from that endless abyss of time and space that held my thoughts captive. " Man you guys need stop wearing my clothes to bed, it is a shirt, not a night gown," I said in a stern manner. "We're hungry," my little brother cried.

       It was apparently feeding time. After all that occurred, it was sobering cooking for these little ones, I wonder how much they actually absorbed. "Shit," I burned myself, hard to believe my body is still numb from all the fighting. The youngest tugged at my shirt, "your not going to be mean to us anymore are you. " What," I said in shock "remember when mommy and daddy were..." 

        While looking at the fresh burn on my hand, I remembered. Things were going to get really bad, when my brother and step dad were bowing up to each other, but before things got to blows my mother grabbed my older sister and through her to the floor. So I quickly grabbed the hands of my youngest sibling and pulled them to the nearest room My little sister begin to pull away, screaming and hitting my arm, "I want to see mommy." With thunder and all the rage I could muster I screamed "GET IN THE FUCKING ROOM!!!" instantly regained my composure, with a drill sergeant like spirit I instructed the oldest "get in the room, close the door, lock it, and don't leave into the noise stops," Like a soldier she responded sharply.

       I crouched down"No sweetie I'm not going to be mean anymore I love you very much, and your food is going to get cold, so less talking and more eating." With a mouth full of unprocessed food, she muttered "good, I like you when you're nice, not when you're not nice." 

Too excited to sleep, they asked for stories, to calm their spirits and one by one they fell to sleep. I slept at the foot of their bed, to make sure they were safe.

            I woke up to a numbing sensation in my right arm. "Ok, I need to get up," I said to myself in a rather decrepit voice. When I finally opened my eyes, I came to find, these three little ones had migrated from the bed, to the floor to my back and for arm, huddled like penguins. My oldest little sister ten said " we didn't want the bed monster to get you."

           Thinking long and hard " shit, was I protecting them last night or were they protecting me." Now at the ripe old age of twenty one and years of age perfecting the art of procrastination, of course while in the library at my college typing away. I know now "if I did not stand for them, I would have fallen for myself."

The Amphibian

 

 

Amphibian, the first thing I got right the first time I felt I mattered to someone, was when I spelled this word that had four syllables and had a P and an H instead of an F.

In the 3^rd grade only one out of twenty students in my class got this correct and I was the student.

 My teacher was so proud and she wanted to thank my parents for helping me.

 If only she knew, I wish she knew, I hated her for not knowing.

Not knowing that there are others words you could not have paid me to spell like, parents, safety or love.

 But I could spell broken just fine.